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For my own part, I was weened on Star Wars. After a period of droid-mania, I was duly impressed with Han Solo. In the cantina scene, he copped a certain devil-may-care attitude that I hoped to cop myself one day. I ran into Chad Meserve's article while prowling around the web and went looking for it again in late 2002. I needed a laugh. To my chagrin, the page was gone. Fortunately, Google still had a cache of it. With a little editting by the busy-body webmaster, here it is:

How George Lucas screwed up Star Wars

George Lucas thought the scene between Han Solo and Greedo in the cantina made Han cold blooded. Let's think about the original scene, shall we? Greedo the bounty hunter is holding Han at gunpoint and says in his gurgly argot that he is going to kill him. Han shoots Greedo through the table before Greedo can blow Han a new smuggling hatch. That's makes Han cool-- not cold.

[new scene]

Now let's look at the new scene. Greedo is sitting with Han at gunpoint again, only this time Greedo states his intent to kill Han and then shoots the wall. Han quickly avenges the stucco and blows away Greedo. Boy does the new scene stink! Even a stormtrooper could have hit Han at that distance! Perhaps Greedo turned to a life of crime after flunking out of Stormtrooper Academy.

If you still don't agree with me that changing the Greedo scene was a mistake, maybe you should consider...

Top 10 Other Things that Han Shot that Didn't Shoot at Him First

10. A poor, defenseless Minoc This flappy critter couldn't even operate a gun, much less shoot at Han.
9. The Space Slug Just moments after the cold-blooded Minoc shooting, we see Han shoot the insides of a space creature kind enough to have an atmosphere and gravity in its stomach.
8. A stormtrooper Given slightly lower test scores, this guy could have been a bounty hunter.
7. The garbage compactor door Even Leia thought this was excessive.
6. The intercom at the Detention Block Think of all the calls home Imperial troops had made from that comm unit. "Hi Mom. We blew up Alderaan today. Give love to Pop."
5. An officer on the Death Star Hey, that could have been a Bothan spy. They're masters of disguise, you know.
4. Imperial probe droid Before he left the base, Han listened to the garble it was transmitting and said, "It isn't friendly whatever it is." If you don't know what it is, how can you tell it is bad? There might have been space kittens in there.
3. Vader's wingman The guy was given a direct order not to fire. He was just around for moral support.
2. The Sarlacc tentacle It was only trying to eat Lando-- heck, didn't Chewie want to do that at the end of Empire?
1. His poor, dying Tauntaun Perhaps in the special edition, Lucas should have animated the tauntaun going nuts and in the throes of death, clawing out one of Han's eyes or grabbing his blaster and squeezing off a few shots-- making it justifiable to spill its smelly macaroni guts in the snow.


[It's Greedy!]